E-Mails

E-Mails From An Asshole 9-9

September 9th, 2011

Comanche Quest

Original ad:
looking for a jeep comanche. must be running and in good condition. can pay up to $500. offers for other trucks will be ignored.

From Mike Partlow to *********@*********.org:
Hey, I couldn’t help but notice your ad looking for a Comanche. I don’t have one, but seeing as it is such a rare car I figured I’d help you out and put you in touch with a friend of mine who is selling his. Would you like his contact information?

Mike

From Joel ******* to Mike Partlow:
yeah that would be great thanks

From Mike Partlow to Joel *******:
Okay, it is ***********@gmail.com. Just tell him Mike sent ya.

Mike

From Joel ******* to Mike Partlow:
ok thanks

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E-Mails From An Asshole 7-22

July 22nd, 2011

Clumsy Seller

Original ad:
MULTI-DISC CD player wanted
WTB a CD changer that can hold at least 50 CDs. Must be in good condition. Email or call 215-***-****

From Me to *********@*********.org:
Hello,

I am selling my 60-Disc Technics SL-MC4 CD changer. This thing is in excellent condition and works great. I have included a picture of it. I’m asking $75 for it. Please let me know if you are interested.

Best,

Mike

Attachments:

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E-Mails From An Asshole 7-15

July 15th, 2011

Childhood Classics

Original ad:
Wanted – CHILDRENS DVDS
Movies wanted for children aged 5 and up – will take all unwanted DVDs!

From Me to *********@**********.org:
Hey there!

I’m trying to get rid of a bunch of movies I’ve had since I was a kid. The movie stores won’t take them, and it would be a shame for me to just throw them out. I’d love to pass them on to people who can enjoy them. Let me know if you are interested.

Mike

From Julia ****** to Me:
Mike – Which movies do you have and how much do you want for them?
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E-Mails From An Asshole 6-24

June 24th, 2011

Rocked

Original ad:
Clean fill
Need clean fill rocks are fine. not much. cannot pick up must deliver. will take off you hands for free.

From Me to brad ********:
Hello,

I have some rocks I need to get rid of. I have several different types of rocks ranging from 1/2″ to 6″ rocks. Just let me know what kind you want, how much you need, and when I can send my guy to deliver.

Thanks,

Mike

From brad ******** to Me:
well i need them to fill a small whole in my backyard so bigger rocks i guess? 6 inch would be good. i only need like 2 wheelbarow loads so not too many. when can you deliver?

From Me to brad ********:
6″ it is. I can have a truck there to deliver any time between 9-5 Monday through Friday. Where are you located?

Mike
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E-Mails From An Asshole 6-10

June 10th, 2011

Incompetent Phone Repairman

Original ad:
PHONE BROKEN? NO PROBLEM! ***PHONE REPAIRS***
We can fix any phone problem, and fast! Have your phone fixed while you wait. Water damage? No problem. Cracked screen? No problem. Low prices! Customer satisfaction is our priority.
We are located off of Rt 3 near Upper Darby.

From Me to ***********@*********.org:
Hi there,

I’m not sure what happened, but my phone simply stopped working last night. I was talking on it and it suddenly shut off and won’t turn on. Do you think you would be able to repair it?

Mike

From Will ******* to Me:
We most certainly can fix it. What kind of phone is it?

From Me to Will *******:
Oh, I’m not sure…I’m not too good when it comes to technology. If I took a picture of the phone, would you be able to tell?
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